You are the 'CHANGE'

Many of you knows that I recently started doing my masters in full time program. In my very first class I met one girl who was my Junior at school. I did not recognize her at first meeting then she revealed that she was my Junior at high school. 

Having full time program at college means the luxury of timeless chitchat in classroom as well as in canteen. This friend has become good friend to me in just few days.  Of course, the reason behind was having many common friends. It was my first semester in the college and I came to know that is she studying with only one purpose. The object was to find good groom by using this education qualifications. I was completely shocked and speechless but I did not react on it as she already made this as her first choice. I remember saying her that in our community to work out side from home for women is not allowed. I still couldn't believe that 'Is she the same person I met her on first day of my college'.

One day she came to college after long time till then we had just heard the news of her engagement other than that there was no communication from her. We were all so curious to know more details about her engagement and pre and post marriage plans. We were sitting in the canteen and one by one we were throwing questions to her out of our curiosity about her sudden engagement plan. From her every answer we just got the gist that she is all set to move to her new life. I remember her having discussion with her on wedding date as my wedding date and hers was clashing so she thought of changing it so we both can attend each others wedding. At that time also I asked her that'don't you think this is very quick decision or you are just jumping to finish everything by getting married so soon', she replied that she is Okay with this. I stopped myself after this from digging into her matters though somewhere I had that feeling this may could go wrong. Before few weeks we met again after our weddings. On the first day we just shared the happy moments and changes of marriage life with each other. The days were passing and we both were observing the changes we are carrying and then she spoke up to me for the first time that you know Kinjal you can do all this things but I can't. The talks were about carrying yourself with such clothes in college. I was not so surprised  with her this statement so I argued that what is wrong in wear this kind of clothes after marriage? She said if I do like this then people will start talking about me? I asked really? This is the thing which bothering you so much by wearing jeans and tops? She simply nodded. I sat quite for a moment and then asked her gently to change this habit to care always about what people will think or talk about. I argued with her that you are from our generation, so if you don't like things then you are the one who initiate the change.  Again she argued about people. After few days of this incident she again came back to me with same complaint, this time I was so clear on what to answer. I told her very clearly stop complaining about things if you can't even try to change it. My intention was again to make her strong to change things which she don't like. She is still there, living the same life. My argument did not make any changes in her life. It feels bad when I see her suffering for small-small things everyday.

On the contradictory side, I know many people who belongs to the same community from where she belongs. In-fact my two best buddies are from the same community but I never heard them saying such things. From the above mentioned two, one of my friend doesn't have any male siblings So I have also seen his father treating her equally. I saw her father taught her everything like bike riding, car riding, business terms etc. Presently she is working with one Financial sector as very strong independent women after marriage also. We can clearly see her there is no role of people here for think or talk about anything. It clearly stats that the person's thought process brings the change along with not the people's reaction.

Recently, I and Ruchit were talking about the development happening in our city. In this discussion I said Ruchit we are the luckiest generation who will witness the change. He stopped me there and told me Kinjal we are not only witnessing but we can make the change, in-fact we are the 'Change'. This statement of him I find it so perfect when I see above this examples closely.